Avoid him

How can you avoid someone when their sitting on top of you

Prostitute

The only way I can get what I want is through financial means

So like a prostitute ?

He's baaaack

So he texted me again.  Our texts went on for a few hours.  I was the last one to text him so now I can't text him until he texts me.  It's not like I can't live without him.  I have gone out with other men it just isn't the same.  It feels different now.  I still love him but I don't need him now I just want him.  I guess that means I've grown in a way.  He was all i thought about.  Comparing him to every new guy.  But it's obvious now he doesn't feel the same and I'm ok with that.  I'm ok with that because recently a few men have told me they love me and i didn't feel the same.  I felt bad for them.  I never told the guy i always assumed he knew.  Of course he knew.  He used to talk about me behind my back to my friends, his friends, and even a woman whose child I watched while she went out with her boyfriend.   I trusted that woman.  I'm too trusting obviously.   She made fun of my clothes , my intelligence and spoke about a crush I had on a boy to the boy himself, how that happened I have no idea,. I have major trust issues these days.  I can't take a compliment from a guy with out thinking he has an alternative motive.  Although that is usually true.  Most men compliment girls to sleep with them eventually.  Some guy told me he never realized how pretty I was.  And then tried something else.  I should have known.  I'm not accepting compliments any more.  I didn't create myself so technically I cant.

This love has taken its toll on me

So he hasn't answered my texts for a fortnight now actually 19 days to be exact.  He is either dead, has no wifi, or is ignoring me.  I dont mind if he is ignoring me because I do that too sometimes.   I guess that means I'm done.  No more drunk dialing.  No more stupid texts on his birthday.   Nothing.  I'm moving on and I mean it this time one more drunken text is all I'm allowing myself.  Which will happen on new years eve when I'm very drunk.  And then goodbye.  Goodbye to your memories.  Goodbye to those air conditioned summers.  I'm almost done using the cologne I bought for his birthday.   It still reminds me of him but it's a limited edition so I'll probably never smell it again.  I hate this part.   The part where you have to force yourself to let go because I think I still love him but it can't go on because it's starting to tread into stalker territory.  I know I'll regret this one way or another but it's been way to long i met him in June 2010.  That was the best summer ever.  And now it's just a memory that I will lock away in my head where I can't remember it.  A memory that will be blocked out until I hear his name or pass his st or even see him again.  THE END I HOPE

I did it again

At first I thought his friend may have liked me but it was becoming more obvious that he didn't when he left.  He only left because we left him out of the conversation.   And that's when his friend started hitting on me.  And i didn't think he was serious at first.  But he was kinda cute though and I was bored so ..........

I knew it was a mistake and he will probably tell his friends when he is drunk but I don't care because not a lot happened.  I wish I hadn't but it was fun.  And now he probably won't even look at me if I ever see him again.  This is so sad I kind of liked talking to him as a person and now he'll look right past me as if I'm part of the scenery.

This is why I don't have a boyfriend

So a guy drives by signals to me and makes a u turn.  I should have known it would end badly from that.  a few days later We go to a pool hall and drink some beer.  As we approach my destination he asks if it's OK for him to jerk off.  WTH IS THIS WHAT A FIRST DATE ENDS WITH?  WHAT IS WRONG WITH MEN THEY ARE SO GROSS   

The job lasted a bit longer than a fortnight

It was not entirely my faughlt.  They gave me old ads to call.  A main reason for being let go was because of the lack of ads I got for the peridical.  How can they expect me to obtain ads when they send me out to get organic juice, perscriptions, and make your coffee.  And on top of that I had to proof read ads and send emails to over 25 company's.  Who has time to get ads.  This was very stressful.  I knew I would get sacked because the boss kept whispering in my ear "Sara if you don't get ads I won't have any use for you" several times a day.