Revelation

I was at the bar Saturday night.  It was around 2:30 and I was soberish.  As I sipped my fruit loops flavored vodka from a water cup I had a revelation.  Every guy that I thought was interested in me didn't actually want me as a person they just wanted to have "relations" one way or another.  It hit me like a ton of bricks and as I looked at my straw I sighed.  I guess people noticed my dazed look because the bartender asked if I was ok.  I looked up at his handsome face and nodded my head.  It was too hard to speak I didn't want to reveal the truth that my whole love life was a sham.  As I slurped the last of my "vodka/water" the female bartender asked if I wanted more water I nodded and she took my cup.  I hoped she didn't smell the vodka in it.  The handsome bartender came back and asked me to point out the guy so he could kick him out.  I told him he wasn't here as I thought about the guy from about a month ago.  I couldn't believe I wasn't over him yet.  Why do I always fall for guys that don't even like me.  I am so easily deceived.  I'm surprised I haven't been killed by now or at least roofied.  The female bartender handed me my cup of ice water and I mumbled a "thankyou".  As I sipped the water I saw a man looking at me from across the bar.  He wasn't bad looking, but anyone could look good in this bar it was dark but light enough to find your chair.  A really tall man , about 6"11, walked over to me.  I remembered him from the last time I was at the bar.  He was one of the bouncers.  He asked if I was OK I said yes and he asked if I wanted a drink.  I said yes and told him a long island.  He said he'll be right back and walked away.  The bartender gave me the drink.  Lesson learned if you look really depressed and your cleavage is on point some one will buy you a drink

Genetics

I always thought it was genetic
but I was wrong
It was just you
You're responsible for this
You're the one that makes me feel this way
To want to say goodbye everyday
To want to leave behind my memory
Sometimes I forget
Because I programmed my brain
To wipe away the memories
But every time I think I'm OK
You remind me why I should go away
You ruined my childhood that day
When we didn't leave and we stayed
I blacked it out
But it's still there
Lingering behind my hair
A little girl of 5 or 6
The way I dealt with all of this
I do not know
I don't remember
What had happened in December
But after the events of that day
The little girl walked away
Leaving behind a broken child
Not understanding anything at all
You'll never know
I won't tell
I can't wait to go to he'll